Monday, November 17, 2003

bazaar season

Funny who you run into at all these bazaars. Now that it's Christmas season, the bazaars have started sprouting here and there. My friend Cris sold me a booklet of tickets to this charity bazaar at Makati Sports Club over the weekend. I sold some to my officemates and my family; was there both Saturday and Sunday. It was the usual bazaar thing, except Cris' chef-boyfriend Rommel had a booth selling pasta and a heavenly panna cotta, yum!

Another acquaintance from school was also there selling jars of tsokolate (rich chocolate), and I ran into some old friends, former students, and what-not. Was able to buy some small gifts and charity Christmas cards from Museo Pambata, although am reserving part of my Christmas budget for a trip to Greenhills. What's Christmas shopping without going to Greenhills' tiangges after all? Divisoria is out of the question right now because I don't think I can stand the crowds anymore, although the really cheap stuff would be there. Sigh.

defined by x
No, not a nerdish post about math (although I've been tempted to in the past--teehee). It's just both funny and annoying. In the bazaar mentioned above one of the organizers is someone I know from a few years back named Mike. Here's how my conversation with Mike went:

Mike: Hey I know you!
Ri: Hey I know you too!
(exchange pleasantries while I dig up his name in my memory banks)
Ri: Mike J! (on a whim) I bet you don't remember MY name...
Mike: Uhhhh...
Ri: Hmmm...
Mike: You're LM's ex!

So there. I have been defined by my ex. That's happened more often than you think and it's sometimes annoying. I feel like I wasn't able to establish my own identity; something I'm working on right now sans boyfriend, and having a hard time at it. Oh well.

conversations with someone to whom i don't give much credit
I always thought X was a two-timing jerk and playboy whose sole mission in life was to flirt with all the babes in the office. When he and his longtime girlfriend broke up around last year I thought that it was just karma on his part. But they've gotten back together and I think that he's happier now. He's also one of the people that I consider my friend but it seems that that "friendship" was based on mutual friends, shared gimmicks and occasional lunches.

Last Friday night (early Saturday morning), was just really glad that he was there, even if his girlfriend was still looking for him. Apparently he sensed that I was feeling rather low despite the happy facade. "You miss having a boyfriend," he told me. True, true. I don't miss the boyfriend after all, maybe just the thought of having one. I miss having someone always there with me for every gimmick and event in my life (every single thing)--hence the frustration over not having anyone to watch Matrix Revs with. But other than that I don't really miss much about being in a relationship. Minor downside. Right now I'm more frustrated at not being able to be more happy with just myself.

Anyway, I can't thank X enough for insightful conversations over coffee and for holding my hand (of course in a non-romantic way). It's the little things like these that keep you fine. And sane.

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